Peace in an Internal Storm: Creation and Destruction

The holidays and year end create both excitement and disappointment, the weeks are filled with emotional highs and lows. The day after Christmas (I was raised Catholic, so that is our family focal point and tradition) is said to be one of the most depressing days in America. For some, the depression starts before the Holidays and for others it begins the moment that the last present is opened.

For many, the holidays are a stark reminder of the difference between an idealized vision of how our lives should be and the reality of the how we live most days. It is important to note that the holidays merely bring to our consciousness an underlying truth that escapes our attention most of the time. The truth is that the reality of our lives and the envisioned results that we want for ourselves are not the same much of the time.


Our families and friends and our connection or disconnection to them becomes a major part of the fabric of our end of year holiday experience. Aloneness plays tag with loneliness if we are apart from our loved ones. Not only is anxiety in the air, but so is reflection. This is for many a time to build energy into resolutions to change in the coming year.

The challenge here is twofold. On one hand, the difference between current reality and a desired result is empowering. It empowers one through the very tension that is experienced. On the other hand, the emotions that are brought up can be difficult to both feel and endure.

The cycle of creation and destruction of love and loss has been studied deeply by both students and teachers on a spiritual path. While it can be explained simply, whether in Buddhist or Western terms, it is quite another matter to live through it.

How can you remain a fully engaged and compassionate person and not be overwhelmed by both these internal storms?

The person committed to creating must be open to the true difference between reality and desired results, but must build inner strength to function when the awareness of the gap between the two causes pain in the heart. Inner strength comes from being both attached to life and yet detached from our efforts. Some efforts succeed and other efforts fail. Some help us move forward in creating and others take us backwards and yet we are only guaranteed to fail when we cease in our efforts.

Putting forth a good effort, an effort which fully reflects your passion, your values and your creativity, is all that you can control and all that really matters. Paying attention to the results but accepting that the world in which you create lies completely out of your control and only marginally open to your influence. Treating the failure of results as an opportunity to learn and then applying learning tools such as critical thinking and analysis will keep you moving. Even so you will need to rest and rejuvenate and find a peaceful place to do so.

Peace is found at the center of the storm. Peace is found when we both acknowledge the grace we receive every day and accept the eventual loss of every thing we possess or attempt to possess. We move out to create and experience both creation and destruction. We move inward to find peace and experience ourselves.

Build or find a small place or space where you can retreat to during these times and then pay attention to the signs and signals that it is time to go there. When you can find peace alone with yourself you are on the path of building inner strength as well as cultivating the experience of inner peace.